when anything is exposed by the light, it becomes visible…(Ephesians 5:13)
There have been many times when I have walked into my room, seen a mess and instead of dealing with it, I’ll just turn the light off to “avoid” the problem.
Our lives are a lot like that room. As God’s impenetrable light shines into the messes of our hearts there are two responses we can make; we can hide our mess in darkness or humble ourselves in the light. Dealing with our issues in the light is never easy. Cleaning a dirty room is never fun, it takes time, energy and extra effort, but the result at the end is always worth the investment.
The same goes with our spiritual messes. I’ll be honest; I don’t like admitting my weaknesses. I don’t like showing that I have messiness in my life. It makes me feel like I’ve failed somehow at being a good enough Christian. This of course, is not true, but instead, a deception and tactic of the enemy to keep me in spiritual defeat.
All of us have that one closet we shove a bunch of stuff into, hoping no one sees the mess. Truth be told, eventually the doors going to get opened and all the junk is going to come tumbling out and it’s not going to be pretty. The more we hide the mess, the greater our pride grows. The more we believe ourselves to be the “perfect” Christian, the greater our spiritual pride puffs up in our hearts. I have often thought myself “better than” other people, because my sin didn’t seem as bad as theirs. Yet, even in that moment, I have proved myself a great sinner.
I wish I had this Christian life all together. I wish I could say that I don’t ever fall prey to deception or have an attitude that hides in the darkness. Unfortunately, this is not always the case. Many times, it’s not purposeful hiding. This is why we need God’s impenetrable light through reading His word. We must submit ourselves to Him in humility and seek out the wisdom of others who can speak truth into those areas we cannot see, because of our own blindness to it.
As we do, God’s light starts to fill our hearts as we confess our sins to Him and do the hard work of working with God to clean up those messes in our hearts. At that point, we must let it go and no longer allow the enemy to shame us with it. God sets it free. Through our confession the darkness no longer has a hold on us, but we can walk confidently in the light that “if we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9)
Lord, at times, I feel like chief of sinners. I confess my brokenness to you, Abba; fill me with your light. I wish I had this thing all together, that I never believed a lie or gave way to a sinful attitude. Lord, when you expose the mess of my sin to me, please give me the strength to work in tandem with you to clean it out and not go back to that place of darkness. Lord, I long to be like you. I want a heart like yours. Forgive me for how I have failed you. I know that in you I am forgiven, loved and free. Thank you that your light lives in me as I confess my sin to you. Thank you that you see me as your beloved. Thank you that I am no longer who I was, but YOU are making me new. In Jesus name, amen.