….for the LORD is a God who knows, and by him deeds are weighed ….(1 Sa 2:3).
Ah, the dreaded question at the DMV, “what is your weight?”
Well, lets see, before Christmas, back in 1997 it was…..or, well, sure, it’s actually 123, but my clothes at the doctors office probably weigh a good 5 lbs, and you have to round down and not up, because you never round up with your weight, so I’ll go with 115 or, maybe 112, because I’m planning on losing a few pounds anyway, so lets say 111, because I’m feeling extra ambitious after the holidays.
You know you’ve done it in your head, the mental mind game we play to convince ourselves of something that is not true in the present moment because we fear facing the facts.
Truth is, as much as we play this game in our own minds, the scale always tells the truth. Unfortunately, there’s no getting around what is true or what is not. Truth is truth and facts are facts.
We play the same mental mind game in different areas of our lives. It might not be our weight, but instead our intentions, our reason for doing things and our motivations for pursuing them. Am I doing this to be seen by others? Do I hope to gain their approval through it? Who am I seeking affirmation from- them, or God?
Am I pursuing this business venture because I want to have money in great excess? Do I hope to gain some type of affirmation from people with a grander title and a job that seems more important? Am I signing up my kids for all of these sports because it is what God wants me to do or I feel pressured by the culture to do it?
The Lord weighs out the intentions of our hearts. We cannot hide them from Him. He sees every bit of us. When wondering if we should be doing this or that, the first person to go to is the Lord. The truth might be a hard pill to swallow, but those who are willing to own up to the present weight of their intentions will find freedom from their control. A lightness fills the heart when wrong intentions are set free before the Lord. This is the joy of repentance. No more fudging on the weight or our sin before the Lord, because He sees it all.
Jesus, you see all of me. Some parts of me still need lots of refinement. Forgive me when I make life all about me. Forgive me when I allow my fears to be the reasons why I do things. God, you are the justice keeper, not me. Forgive me when I go before you trying to seek my own justice or make my own way. Father, I want to walk in Biblical wisdom. Help me to see myself in light of your son and the freedom He offers, not in the place of my insecurities and fears that drive me into places of bondage. I want to walk freely with you, in Jesus name, Amen.