Feeling Forgotten

Though he fall, he shall not be cast headlong, for the Lord upholds his hand…(Psalm 37:24)

 
Have you ever felt forgotten? Yeah, me too. Have you ever felt misunderstood or like you were being thrown out for something or someone better? Yeah, me too. Have you ever felt like maybe you messed up so bad that you should be thrown out and forgotten? Yeah, me too.
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It’s easy to feel disposable, small and insignificant. It’s easy to see our sin as irredeemable. It’s easy to believe ourselves to be of little worth, so much to the extent that we believe our own lives to be disposable.
 
I can recall the many times I felt this way as a teenager. I felt unseen, un-noticed and replaceable. Of course, looking back, I know those things weren’t true. However, my poor image and misunderstanding of who I was being made in the image of God kept me from being able to see clearly who I truly was.
 
Now, as an older adult I still struggle with things like shame, feeling like a failure and living in fear. I still wrestle with wanting to be in control of my situations.
 
Though he fall, he shall not be cast headlong….
 
Thankfully, even though we struggle, God never throws us out. Even as Christians, when our sin is great He lifts us back up if we are willing to have hearts of repentance. God will let us wallow in the mud as long as we want. He doesn’t yank us out of the pit, but lovingly pulls us out when we call upon him out of a broken and contrite heart.
 
Whenever we feel as though someone has thrown us out for a better model, or forgotten us we must remember that people will fail us, what really matters is what hand we grab for to pick us back up. We can look to another person to fill our hearts, give us significance or affirm us as valuable. We can turn to a hobby, substance or position to validate us. This, however, changes like the wind. It is futile and fleeting. We’ll spend all our days chasing after the next place or person to find significance. We keep reaching for the wrong hand to pick us back up.
 
We can, however, learn to place all our trust in the Lord Jesus Christ. This requires us to let go of control. It means we learn to lean and press into the Lord Jesus with everything we have. We cannot fear man or love their approval more than God’s. There’s nothing we can do to make a human being love us more. Only God can change hearts. The good news is that we never have to manipulate God’s heart to love us more or forgive us freely.
 
…for the Lord upholds his hand.
 
God never lets go. Will we fall, yes. We do not have to carry shame with us, because as God pulls us up, He says, “Drop that shame, let it go, and set it free. It’s done with, now follow me.”
 
Whenever we feel stuck, it could be there’s something in our hearts that does not trust God or that has been deeply wounded. We carry the wound with us, unable to move forward because our pain from it affects how we deal with people in our present situations. We cannot get any traction, because like the Israelites we are stuck.
 
Maybe we have fallen and the shame we cast upon ourselves is to heavy for us to lift on our own and we feel too dirty to cry out to God. Maybe someone told us as a child that we were of little value. Maybe we were abandoned, neglected or abused and the message we tell ourselves as adults is that others will treat us the same way too. To keep ourselves from experiencing the same emotional pain we shut off our hearts, and cover it with control, criticism and anger.
 
Sometimes, in order to find freedom for today, we have to go back many years to the place of our first wound. Jesus, in all HIs mercy can handle it. We need not fear Him, for He loves us. His mercy for us is new every morning. His faithfulness stretches to the skies. He longs to set us free at the deepest parts of our soul. Will you let Him today?
 
Jesus, you do not throw me out. You love me. You do not forget me. You are steadfast and immovable. Your love is so great. I am lost without out. God, today, I look not to man to affirm me or give me comfort, because I have you. Thank you that you hold my hand and lift me back up when I fall. Jesus, I love you. Thank you for loving me with a steadfast love, amen.

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