Then I was constantly at his side. I was filled with delight day after day, rejoicing always in his presence…..(Proverbs 8:30).
I remember a couple of years ago a friend said to me, “Heather, life is a continual feast with God.” I laughed at her and said, “Yeah, but you don’t know what I’m walking through. How could THIS be a place where I could feast with God?”
There began my journey, into the depth of my heart. My selfish, prideful, fearful heart. God was bringing in difficult circumstances into my life for the purpose of making me a new person. There was something beautiful He wanted to uncover in me underneath all the lies I had held onto so dearly. His loving nudges weren’t working, so by His grace, He brought the dynamite.
As the blast went off in my heart I had two choices to make. Pick up the rubble with God and allow Him to bring forth His healing and make me into a new woman, or cover up the mess with a wall of bitterness and resentment. I knew in order for me to grow, I had to look at my circumstances through a different set of lenses. I had to choose to see the grace of God in the places where I wasn’t getting what I wanted.
This picture represents a big piece of God’s redemption in my life. Truly, as God has reshaped my heart I can see now with eyes of His grace. I am experiencing His redemption. Even though I haven’t got everything I wanted. My heart is happy and full of joy knowing that He is a loving God who showers good gifts upon His children. If it was up to me, things would be different in my life, but this picture represents His grace. It shows me His loving kindness.
As I was viewing this picture after it was taken all I could think about was His grace and redemption. I had missed teaching, and speaking to youth so much and God by His grace, after a season away from it, has brought new opportunities and I am thankful.
There’s a rich word in the Scriptures that help us understand God’s covenantal love for His people. It is Hesed. Hesed is God’s loving-kindness. It is His love that constantly pursues His people. It’s His love that doesn’t give up on His people. It is His love that brings forth redemption. His love is what the heart needs when life brings difficult circumstances. It is His Hesed that we must lean into. Truly, if we do not we will become bitter, angry people.
As we draw upon God’s grace we have hope for a brand new day. We can rest in His love for us and find joy in His provision. Sometimes God His handing us joy and we’re waiting for Him to fill our hands with our demands. When I align my heart with God I find that joy awaits me in the places of my selfish, unruly heart. It is my heart that is being made new through His Hesed. It is the love of Christ that wins out over my selfish heart because I’m choosing to receive from God the grace of His provision and not demand anything different.
Lord, you are making me new. I am thankful for your grace in the small things. I am thankful that from the hand of your provision comes grace. Grace is what I need to make it through the day and your Hesed is what I can drink from when life feels unfair. Truly, you love to give good gifts. You are full of joy. You give me joy because my heart is alive in you. You are a gracious, loving and perfect God and my heart is happy in you, in Jesus name, Amen!