Control Issues: Don’t Push…Wait Patiently

If a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand….(Mark 3:25).

As a wife, I have learned the joy of waiting for my husband. Waiting for God to speak to him, not pressuring or pushing, but waiting with great patience and hope. For quite some time I used to become overwhelmed with anxiety if things didn’t go my way. I would drop subtle hints or try to argue my way. Now I’ve learned to present something, step back, and pray. To be patient and let my husband lead. To listen to the Lord and not grow weary or anxious in the waiting.
I realize that underneath my struggle was really a desire to be in control. To be in control of things that were out of my control. We cannot control another person in marriage, we must allow them the time and space to process and pray. To push, manipulate or pressure only makes that person feel uncared for and disrespected. No man or woman will ever feel valued as an individual in marriage if they are constantly being pressured into doing things they aren’t ready to do
There is no perfect marriage. Marriage is by far one of the hardest things I have ever done. Yet, there is grace, forgiveness, love and new beginnings. People really can grow and change. People really can let go of old habits. The problem is that either we can’t let the past go, or we keep allowing our hearts and minds to stay stuck in the past.
I have learned as a wife, the best person I can be for my husband is his encourager. Even if he failed terribly the day before, my heart must be ready to encourage, esteem and value him above all others. Many marriages have died because the heart of a woman or man couldn’t let go of the hurt that their spouse has caused them. Love never grows when our hearts keep being reminded of our pain, but love can be revived if we learn to see the good in someone and look forward to new beginnings, holding fast to the hope of God.
Now, I’m not saying we should stand for behavior that becomes destructive, there should always be boundaries drawn for that. Boundaries are healthy and should be encouraged in those circumstances. The beautiful thing about God is that He can even take those types of situations and grow people if both parties are willing to forgive and let go. He can make something beautiful out of our pain if we are willing to hold fast in faith and not become bitter or resentful.
A house divided amongst itself cannot stand, because, quite frankly, someone has an issue with control. Wait patiently for the Lord, don’t push or prod, allow God to do His thing. Trust me, God doesn’t need your help. Take a step back and find joy in the process of waiting. He’s growing your heart too and your house will experience the joy of being one of heart and mind for the Lord Jesus Christ.
Lord, you are so good. I believe you for great things. You are a mighty God. You see me and you love me. I have so much growing to do, but you are truly making me new. Thank you for your resurrected love and power, in Jesus name, Amen!

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