When Shining My Light For God Feels Too Vulnerable and Scary

“You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden”….(Matt 5:14).

Sometimes the light God wants us to shine for Him is scary. It’s scary because it exposes broken parts of our lives, that although they have been redeemed bring up moments and seasons we’d rather stay hidden. You see, the Lord is challenging me, right now, in this present moment to be the most vulnerable I have ever been in my life. To shine His light in my life on something I’d rather not talk about in such a public way. It feels safer to keep going on as is without needing to go there, but something inside of me is reminding me that beauty is found when we’re willing to go to hard places. Bridges are built between us and others when we share the deepest, darkest and most broken moments of our lives.
I love to shine my light for Jesus when it feels easy and safe. It’s great when the champion of my story is me and I did things right, life was beautiful and everything went on without a hitch. The problem is that does very little to display the power of God. Instead, it makes the focal point me and my ability to be good.
The Lord is asking me to trust Him and let go, to go somewhere hard because it puts Him on display. You see, whenever we shine God’s light on the darkness of our past, it puts HIs glory on display as others see His work in our lives. It gives them hope because maybe they’re walking the same difficult journey.
There’s this other voice in me though that says, “this is dumb and pointless, no one is going to care, you’re wasting your time.” I know that’s the enemy. He always uses similar, discouraging tactics against me. But I know within that lie is actually God’s truth. You see, Satan will always whisper to us the opposite of what God is going to do to try to keep us from being courageous for God. So, instead, I’m believing that I’m not wasting my time and that my transparency will hold within it a great purpose.
I’m not sure what story you have that you’d rather not talk about, but understand that it can be your greatest treasure to share with others for the glory of God. Our broken moments are not supposed to stay hidden. They’re supposed to be set up on a hill. Then others can see the working of God in our lives and be drawn to the power of grace. It’s where they see the love of God that works for broken sinners in need for grace like you and me. Would you be willing to be that light for someone today?
Lord, I trust you. I won’t believe the lie that my story is pointless. I won’t entertain the thought that me stepping out to share something vulnerable is stupid. If it makes me a fool for Christ than so be it, but please use my story to point others to your love. Let it be so, I pray, in Jesus name, Amen.

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