Do not leave Jerusalem, but wait for the gift my Father promised, which you have heard me speak about….(Acts 1:4)
I used to live a very anxious, always moving, always feeling the need to do more kind of life. This is how I operated in ministry. I’d come up with a million great ideas and work immensely hard to see them through. I’d work more hours than I could count and there were many times I was so burnt out that I just about threw in the towel.
Although there was nothing wrong with my desires to reach more people I am realizing now that my best effort is not in trying harder, but using my time more wisely. Not running frantic, but sitting still, listening to my Father’s voice and acting when He is impressing upon me to rise and go. Sometimes our efforts aren’t accomplishing much for the Kingdom, as it was in my case on different occasions, because we’re not actually operating out of the Spirit’s power, but instead, our own efforts to make things happen or become something of value.
I no longer feel the need to be defined by what I do. I also don’t sense any anxiety to try harder to show others I have value. I simply want to find rest in my Father’s love. It’s so freeing here. I’ve never been less anxious or less performances based. Life has never been so slow, but quite honestly, I’m not sure that life has ever been this full.
Life just feels better here. I can see now what I needed all along was not something more to do. What I needed was rest. Now I’m finally starting to see why God allowed, for well over a year and a half for me to be thrust into this place of waiting that I absolutely abhorred. That season taught me how to become a person, not defined by her performance. It taught me that my greatest treasure is and it’s not in what I do, but who I am in Christ.
Be encouraged today to find rest in your Father’s love. Truly, the best you is a well rested one. Not someone scurrying about trying to prove their worth, but someone who finds great joy in simply being a child of God.